Our family was in a very dark and scary place six months ago. For the past two years our nine year old son had slowly become more and more out of control. He ran away from home, was verbally defiant to everyone who tried to discipline or correct him. He was abusive to myself and his younger siblings. He was violent and aggressive to anybody that would try to intervene if he was in a rage. Our family felt powerless and at his mercy when he was in a middle of an outburst.
Although he had been diagnosed with ADHD and in counseling for the past two years I felt like things were slowly getting worse, not better...
God’s answer came through finding, reading and implementing this book, A House United, by Nicholeen Peck. I also participated in several mentoring phone calls with Nicholeen since we had some unusual circumstances. She has taught me the things I needed to do to heal our families’ relationships. I am sometimes frightened when I think about where we were at a few months ago and how desperate I felt. I was very close to giving up completely on my son for the sake of the survival of the rest of our family. Since that time we have made tremendous progress with our son and seen miracles as we have humbled ourselves enough to change, the heart of our son has changed as well.
He has gone from a dark, raging, angry person who was punching holes through walls to attack us in a rage, to a child who will occasionally volunteer to help with household chores, playing kindly with his younger siblings, and slowly mastering the four basic skills: following instructions, accepting consequences, accepting a no answer, and disagreeing appropriately. A few months ago we went six days without a blowup before he lost it, a few weeks ago he met his goal of going a full week. I am still amazed. We still have a long way to go, but he has made tremendous progress during the past few months.
I will tell you this: if you are looking for a quick easy fix, this book is not for you. If you want to forge the strongest family bonds possible, to repair damaged relationships, and redeem a child that seems completely lost, then this book IS for you. But it will take a lot of prayer, tears, and hard work. You will no longer wonder what to do. Instead you will daily battle with forcing yourself to do what you know you should do. If you have the courage and diligence to read, re-read and act on what you read you can change the hearts of your children and yourself. This book is the most effective parenting program that I have seen for winning the battle for our children’s hearts and souls. It is a battle I pray to win, and to say one days like Paul (2 Timothy 4:7) “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.